Why are we so suspicious, even fearful, of something that is not like we are? We judge the clothing people wear, the way they talk, their hairstyle, their car, their food preferences, their religion and even their shoes – as if there is some formula for acceptance that we alone are privy to!
If someone is not like us or doesn’t align with the rules of our community, we reject or humiliate them, or label them dangerous.
It is as if we want to look into the eyes of someone else and see ourselves. Are we all so egocentric or narcissistic that we, ourselves, must be the only supreme authority on All That Is Truth?
And here is the kicker…underneath all of our judgment and suspicion, we are all trying to be individuals with unique ideas and a mind of our own. In a very unbalanced, conflicted way we strive to be Unique and to Belong.
We all have a primal ability to scan our lives for danger. This has been true since prehistoric times. Our ancient roots also bring with them a need to be in community. The community was our salvation. It literally kept us safe and alive. Without our community, we would never have survived the dangers of our daily lives.
The communities we bond with today can use physical brute force to protect their members, but they are more apt to shame or humiliate when threatened.
So...with the support of our community we criticize and judge. To actually not side with the community means we risk being ostracized – and that is terrifying! Without our primal community backing us, we died. The same response is triggered today. If we lose our community, we fear dying. This death can be literal or figurative. Either way, it is terrifying.
The saddest commentary about our harsh judgment of those who are different from us, is that we are all the same at Heart. All of us spend our lifetime in search of Love. We all long to Love and to be Loved. Every one of us! Why don’t we see that struggle in each others’ eyes and realize we are one, One Family?
We are all struggling to live a good life, to navigate our trials, to nurture our families, to provide for our children, to do a good job for fair pay, and to feel pride in a life well lived. We want to be a good friend, a good parent, a good role model, a good child, to have shelter we call home, to have enough to eat, to feel healthy – physically, emotionally mentally and spiritually – and to Love and to be Loved.
This is my wish…
Next time we look at someone, individually or collectively...may we see the sameness in each others’ eyes.
